One thing I learned so far is ‘To truly change the way you look at your life, you first need to change yourself’. It may sound obvious but this is perhaps the most challenging and uncomfortable thing you ever do. Changing yourself is easier said than done. If you look around in the world, there is always someone who grew up in the same situation and place as you and yet managed to take their life to the next level. Right?
Every morning when you wake up, you can either choose to let negative energy control you or choose to live with positivity. Which one you choose will decide whether you are gonna change your outlook on life or be stuck in the same cycle. What most people don’t realize is that you can change your story with the right mindset.
Let’s take a look at some ways that can actually help you change the way you look at your life.
- Notice your self-talk: Start to notice your inner voice and listen to what your thoughts are saying to you. Studies have shown that our internal chatter is 70% negative. Most of the time, this mental chatter is connected to our self-judgment. Some examples are-
- “I can never learn coding, I am sure nobody likes me, I can never lose weight, I hate the way I look” etc. This kind of self-talk leads our behaviour to be self-critical, pessimistic and discouraging which apparently distorts our mind and the way we look at our life.
Steps to practice positive self-talk:
- Question your negative thoughts, don’t just act on them.
- Practice reframing your negative thoughts with positive words and phrases.
- Avoid using words like ‘Can’t’ and ‘Never’.
- Stop Comparing: In today’s world, it’s really hard to not compare yourself to others with 24/7 access to view others’ lives right on our phones. And you wind up spending hours and hours scrolling through the lives of the people who may or may not be connected to you. It leaves you feeling bad about your life. Comparison takes away the joy you have with what you have and who you are. If we don’t stop the comparison cycle in our mind, we will constantly keep on wasting our mental energy on something we can never win.
Steps to practice stop comparison:
- Practice gratitude.
- Limit the time you are spending on social media.
- Notice the things that trigger comparison in you and avoid them.
3. Practice Giving: Give out whatever makes you feel good about yourself whether it’s joy, kindness, creativity or anything else. Helping others is one of the best ways to change your outlook towards life. For example: you see someone at work struggling with something you can help with or an old woman struggling to get off the bus. Doing kind acts makes you think differently about your life and yourself. Challenge yourself to do at least one random good deed everyday.
4. Practice Optimism: Are you the one who sees the positive even in tough situations? Or are you the one who always focuses on the negative in everything? Optimism doesn’t mean that you ignore life’s stresses. It’s just that when you’re optimistic you approach the hard days in a more productive way. You don’t let the hard days break you. Optimism is a state where you perceive the world, events and other people in the most possible positive light. Steps to practice optimism:
-Start your day by writing the things you are grateful for.
-Focus on your strengths.
-Challenge negative thoughts with more positive ones.
5. Embrace Change: Any change in our life whether it comes from our own decisions or is forced beyond our control can be intimidating, but change is really necessary in order to keep growing and evolving. Instead of getting scared of change, view it as a positive force in your life and embrace it. Soon you’ll see how it changes the way you look at your life.
You must learn in life to take things more lightly, my dear. The world is always changing. Learn how to allow for it
-Elizabeth Gilbert